A Walk by the Sea…

It’s cold and it’s windy. But in its chill, the wind whispers to me, inviting me out to sea. So I get in my Peugeot and go to pick Dana up from in front of the Condor before driving to the coastline. Welcome to El-Mina, the city of waves and horizon…

It’s cloudy, but the light gently plays in and out of the clouds. I study it from inside the car thinking, I haven’t been here in way too long... “Look behind you,” Dana tells me, as I step out of the car to see this:

Heaven lit snow capped mountains, she called them. What a divine site, with the clouds letting just enough light emit from above, shedding daylight on the mountain tops. And in front of them, stands a mosque. And in front of it, stand palm trees, dancing in the wind. Where else could you see such a site?

We walked, with my camera grasped firmly in my hands. But for some reason, my eyes were taking in more beauty than the lens were and so I just kept cradling it from the straps wrapped around my neck…

We came across a flock of seagulls, floating in the breeze, by the water. A veiled lady in black stood there watching them, dancing in and out of water. As I stood by her side to take photos, she seemed to snap out of her reverie, and turned around to continue walking…

I usually cant take such close shots of moving objects, but I was glad I had brought my newest zoom lens along, which helped me capture these flying beauties:

A few minutes onward, we caught up with the veiled lady, standing again, lost in the sea. I remembered going to the beach with a close friend and her mother last year, and I still remember her mother telling me, “Nour, I could look out at the sea forever…” and when I looked at her, I saw this deep and reminiscent look, as if at the bottom of the sea, there lay treasures only she could see. A smile, of mixture of happiness and sorrow, I couldn't tell. But that look her mother had that day, was almost the same look this lady wore. And so I made sure not to let the sea steal my gaze. Because if it did, my thoughts would drown in it too...

We climbed down to the shoreline, which was decorated with thousands of seashells. I’m not sure if this was the same shoreline, but I clearly over a decade of a year back, Dad took my brother and me to an El-Mina shoreline where I picked out some seashells and took them back home, where they still sit in a basket in my room…

On the way back, we ran into a van selling hand carved boats. I’ve always had a fascination with boats; I even have three mini models in my room. I thought one of these would make a wonderful addition to my collection, but I didn't have any money on me and so, I made a mental note to get an El Mina hand carved boat one day in the future. Look, doesn't this last picture remind you of the boat in The Adventures of Tintin?

Today, I was reminded of the beauty of the sea, of El-Mina. It lifted my spirit! Thank You for a beautiful morning by the sea, Dana. It was a refreshing breath of fresh air! :-)

The Picture of Dorian Gray

I've never read the book, nor do I know what it talks about. But the title fits this post, for reasons I prefer to keep to myself…

I first met him at the bank where he was our client, a regular. I’d see him at least several times a week and I’d often take care of his customary banking transactions. He’d always thank me, ending with “God bless you, dear” and inside I’d smile for having satisfied a customer…

He wasn't that old, but he wasn’t young either. He was 73, with the spirit of a man twenty years younger than that. He was accurate and well-organized, always jotting down notes and numbers in his big black notebook. He was a rare gentleman, and sincerely I liked him…

And then I read his name, and the news of his passing. A heart attack…

I shivered. I had just seen him less than 24 hours ago, and he seemed absolutely fine. And now, just like that, I was never going to see him again…

I suddenly became more aware of my own heart beating in my chest cavity. I could feel the blood flowing through my veins and arteries, and all the other organs and vessels inside the human body, how they all function in perfect symmetry with each other… until one day, they stop…

But there’s something soothing about the Quranic verse, “إنا لله وإنا إليه راجعون” which translates into “We belong to God, and to Him we shall return…”

Rest in Peace, K.M.A. 1939 - 2012

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Nour Kabbara on Helwi Beirut - Tripoli Photography

Here it is, my TV interview on LBC's "Helwi Beirut" from last night:

So Sick

Hei blog, it’s me. I know, it’s not like me to post at 11:00am on a Tuesday morning (when I should be at work!), especially at the start of the month (when work needs me the most!) but I finally caught the flu, the kind sucks the life out of you! :-(

I think I began feeling a little queasy a couple of days ago. Typical me, I ignored the symptoms and I went out and about this weekend until I got quite sick on Sunday and spent most of the day in bed. But, I had my cousin’s wedding that night which I couldn't miss for the world, so I ended up feeling sick as a dog…

And, to add insult to injury, I actually woke up and went to work on Monday morning in the dire condition I was in!

Of course I’d overworked myself to the limit by then so I was forced to take off early and headed straight to the doctor’s, who told me that I’d got a combination of a bacterial and viral infection in my trachea (thus the seriously sore throat) and prescribed three different medicines for me and told me its best I take two days off...

So, fast forward from 12 hours of nonstop sleep since 9:00pm last night, I got up this morning, with less pain and less cough, had a light breakfast, and peacefully sipped tea for fifteen minutes (as opposed to gulping it down in 5 minutes at 7:00am as I’m rushing to work). It feels odd though, doing all the things in slow motion… but God, how my body needed a rest!

The First and Last Dance of The Summer

Last night, it was the wedding of Maya and Amro. Or, MayAmro if you join their names together. And when two names can be joined together like that, you know it’s a perfect match! ;-) It was unexpected, a couple of weeks ago, Maya (who I hadn't seen or spoken to in quite a while) came over to personally hand me her wedding invitation. I was delighted, and as I greeted her, I had a flashback to the time we first met…

Maya, we've shared a lot of great moments together, both in and out of Toastmasters. You were like a big sister to me during those years, and I’m thankful for all the wonderful times we've spent. But as I look back I guess I finally see that there was a little part missing in you, a part that not anybody could fill… until you met Amro. He touched that special place in your heart, and I see how much happiness you both bring to each other’s lives… :-)

And so, from all the weddings I've been to this summer, from my friend’s sister’s wedding, to another friend’s wedding, to a colleague’s wedding, this was the wedding that meant most to me. And as many of you know, there is one moment that I look forward to in every wedding: The First Dance. The moment the bride and groom are on the dance floor, with everyone looking at them but them looking only at each other, taking in the music, the feelings, the beautiful moment:

It was a beautiful night, surrounded by beautiful people, beautiful family and beautiful friends, sharing beautiful moments. Smiles in hearts and smiles on faces, I could feel all the love in that room, and love, is really all you need…

With that, dearest Maya and Amro, I wish you the best. I wish the two of you a lifetime of love and happiness together, one that can only keep growing… CONGRATULATIONS!!! xoxo

The Best Mix Tapes

This morning, I got up at 7:00AM. I think ever since I started working, my biological clock’s been ticking especially loud at 7:00AM for me to get on up out of bed and head off to work. So even when I don’t have work on rare mornings (like today!), I still have to hear that alarm in my head!

Mum (the early bird) was already up before me but Dad and my brother were still asleep. And since it was too early to greet the online world just yet, I decided to tidy up my room and as usual, find some old stuff that I’d forgotten about. This time, I found Tapes. Cassette Tapes to be exact. Now for those who grew up in my generation (90’s kids), do you remember this music? This used to be my most treasured musical collection…

I smiled, sighed, and put them all in my “giveaway” plastic bag. I already had all that music either on CDs or in MP3 format, and I’m over 99% sure that I won’t be listening to cassette tapes in the future…

But, just for the sake of remembering, remember when we used to record mix tapes? These are two tapes that two friends recorded for me back in the day. As you can tell, each has a different style of music, with the first leaning towards slower oldies and the second is a combination of the punk band Blink 182’s “Enema of the State” and “Take off Your Pants and Jacket”.

I also came across a couple of old recordings I’d made, from the radio, and an interview. I decided to get rid of that stuff, and took the ribbons out. As I pulled out the seemingly endless ribbons, I remembered Bruno Mars’ video clip for “Just the Way You Are” in which he makes images out of those ribbons. I tried two write “Bye” out of them but to no avail, and all I was left with was this mess on the floor…

I spent a good half hour getting rid of those tapes, but as I put the last of them away, I couldn't help but smile again at the musical means of the time, and how no matter how many years pass by, some music will always remain in our hearts. So this one’s for the music, and the songs we’re singing… (8)

A Time To Remember... 2011

Today is my Two-Year Work Anniversary!! I can’t believe it’s already been two full years. I still remember the little me, 21 years old at the time, when I first joined BankMed. What makes me smile every time I look back is the fact that I never wanted to go into Banking (after all, I was a Marketing major!), yet I found a new passion in Finance. I can hear Daniel and Nadine laughing at me from Kuwait and Jordan respectively: Nour, Finance? LOL! But it’s true; the Financial and Managerial sectors have opened up new worlds to me, worlds I thankfully found myself in. From last March’s One-Year Anniversary to todays second, I’m taking a better look at myself and I like the “Work Nour”!

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For the past two years, March 2nd has been like a double-edged sword for me: Happy for the day as my BankMed Anniversary, yet Sad for the day of my paternal grandmother’s passing away three years ago, on March 2nd, 2008…

I was still in the final year of university; still the little me that I was just talking about. I can’t help but think how different, how better my relationship with her might have been had she known me today. I know she’d have appreciated me being more social, more considerate, more understanding of things like I am today…

Family is one of the greatest blessings in life. Never take them for granted… :)

The House That Built Me

I was reading back on music reviews from the past year, and I noticed there were a lot of good songs I missed out on, like the hilarious “Fuck You” for Cee Lo Green and a couple of smash hits for Bruno Mars, who has just made it to one of my top artists of all time. But one of the songs that caught my attention most, even before listening to it, was titled “The House That Built Me” for country singer, Miranda Lambert…

When I watched the video, I couldn’t help but think back to our old house in Barrhaven, Ottawa. I’ve got a couple of old snapshots for us in the house, but not as many as I’d like. The time before the last time we went to Canada was in 2006, and while we were driving in Ottawa, I asked Dad to take us to our old house in the neighborhood. There was a Range Rover parked out front, and there was a sting in my heart at the sight of our old house being lived in by somebody else…

I wished more than anything that I could go up and knock at the door, for them to open and let me in. Unfortunately, all I’ve got from those times are beautiful childhood memories. I wasn’t that young when we left, as I remember the bedroom I shared with my little brother, the guestroom I turned into my bedroom when I grew a little older, the stairs, the kitchen, the dining room where I first learned to use the computer and played computer games like Monster Bash and Duke Nukem, the living room, the basement, the storeroom, the bathrooms, the pine tree in the front yard (I loved it because as the seasons changed, it stayed evergreen while our neighbors’ trees’ leaves fell during the winter), and the beautiful backyard around which we put up a fence, set up a slide and swing set, planted an apple tree, caught grasshoppers, and played ball…

I could go on and on and I'll always smile at the house I’ll always love the most, the house that built me… :-)

Realizations And Resolutions From 2010

Remember how I started off last year’s “Realizations And Resolutions From 2009”? I talked about how “there’s no such thing as a perfect New Year’s” because you can’t be with everyone you want to be with. Well, I wanted to try to prove myself wrong this year, I tried to split myself between friends and family, spending half the night with friends and the other half with family (both parties mean the world to me). Unfortunately, trying to be in two places at the same time never works well (that’s something I should have learned that from television!). So once again, I have yet to experience my version of a perfect (or at least as good as it gets a) New Year’s…

Then again, I don’t take the nights of the 31st that seriously anymore, after all, it’s the other 365 days of the year that matter most! And now that I've woken up to a bright new 1st of the year, I want to reflect on 2010. I want to go back to my resolutions and see what I've fulfilled; I want to remember all the good that’s happened last year, and all the things I want to still work on. So here we go:

I always put Prayer as number one on my list and I always fall short. I know I’m spiritual, and I believe, but this is something I need to keep working on… :-)

I think I took my good Health for granted last year, or at least I did by not listing it as a major point. Most of the comments I’d gotten every time I’d see someone I hadn't seen in a while were: look how thin you've gotten/ it doesn’t suit you/ you should eat more. Its not like I do it on purpose, I've just got high metabolism! But I have been trying to eat better, and will hopefully continue to do so next year…

Now, for more important things like Family. I've said it before and I’ll say it again, my family is one of the most important things in the world to me. Sure they drive me ballistic at times but I still love them all. Unfortunately, several of them don’t live in Lebanon. Lil brother is in Canada, as are my Uncle, his wife, and my baby cousin Celine. And my aunt, her husband, and my two cousins are in Egypt. We don’t all talk as often as I’d like but I definitely hope to strengthen my relationship with them all, by making more effort to talk with them. And of course to the beautiful family I have here like my parents, grandma, and aunt. Family First!

Just as important to me are Friends. The best of friends are of course the ones who stick with you through time and distance. And I've had so many people walk in and out of my life. But I have to stop and smile at the ones I’m blessed to have in my life, especially this year. Sura, Daniel, Nadine, Ymn, Nan, and Tarek… 6 is my lucky number! :-P of course there are a lot more people that I love in this world, but those 6 are who I’m super thankful for this year… And here’s to the many more memories we’ll hopefully share together next year! :-)

I’m really happy to feel that I've finally fit into the world of Work. I’ve officially been working for a year and ten months now, and I’m really happy. I've gained a lot of experience in that department, and I still have a long way to go. I want to make some noticeable differences next year, I've got to. Fingers Crossed…

On a side note, even though I’m not thinking of doing my MBA right now, I’d like to at least start getting ready for it. I have the book, GMAT, and I want to get through it. It’s tough, but I’m going to start taking things more seriously in terms of my future education…

Along that line though, I did it! It took longer than I thought it would but I finally completed the Toastmasters program, earning both the “Competent Leader” Award in June and the “Competent Communicator” Award in November. I had said that I wanted to serve as club Treasurer during the third season of LoudSpeakers, and I did, I actually served as both Treasurer and Sergeant at Arms. I had also said I also said I wanted to take on a more demanding officer role during the fourth season in June 2010 but by then I have to admit I wasn't feeling very satisfied with the club… All of a sudden, Ymn left, and then Maya, and then Diala (who were the main people I used to look forward to going to TM for). A lot of new members joined, ice breakers, first time roles, and I suddenly began feeling like I had failed a class, like no one was at the end of the program with me; everyone was just leaving or just starting… So, I decided it was time for me to wrap it up as well, and with that, the Toastmasters part of my life reached a thankful end…

But, with every end there’s a new beginning, right?! This year, I’m going to officially join We Love Tripoli. I first heard of them early this year when I went on their “Shoot As You Walk” events, where we’d talk around the city, taking pictures of Tripoli. We've also became locally quite famous, with articles and exhibitions all about us! And I love raising awareness and making a difference towards Tripoli!

Now, it can’t be all work and no play, right? That’s right, I asked for a Vacation. Last year, since I still hadn't fulfilled my 1 year work probation period yet, I wasn’t entitled to any working days off. But as of March, I was entitled to 28 working days off! And I have to admit, I've outdone myself! In Lebanon: January, I went on a trip with Toastmasters to The Cedars, during the Summer, I went on a trip with Mum, lil brother, my two aunts, two cousins, and a family friend to Zahle and Chouf and it was so much fun, rediscovering Lebanon together. I had a lot of fun with my baby cousin Celine whilst she was here. I spent a lot of time at the beach, on islands, in Jbeil, in Beirut, shopping, with friends… Outside Lebanon: Back during the Easter Break, Mum, my aunt, a family friend, and I all went to spend four days in Aleppo, Syria. Two weeks after that, I took another four days off work and I went to visit Dad in Amman, Jordan and my best friend Nadine, Mira, Sari, Akram, and even Danny flew in from Kuwait for an AUB reunion! But the best trip of the year (or of my life actually), was when I combined three days off work to the Eid-Al-Adha & Independence day vacations for a nine day getaway with Mum to Kuala Lumpur & Langkawi, Malaysia! And it was incredible beyond words… Four countries in one year, that’s something! Yes, I benefited from my vacations this year to the max. Unfortunately, next year I’m only entitled to 15 working days, 12 of which must be taken consecutively. I’m really hoping to go to Dubai during the 2011 Shopping Festival, and I’ll try to take advantage of the two week vacation I’m most probably going to be taking in the summer. I’d opt for either a cruise, Turkey, or a European country like Italy or Spain. I’d also like to think I’m smart when it comes to taking advantage of official holidays like Easter or Eid, so that’s something I look forward to working with, taking advantage of every free moment, because they’ll stay free if you don’t do something with them!

I can’t say that I've Read more this year. All the books I said I wanted to read last year, I didn’t read them. But I guess the style of my reading has changed. Yes, I did read novels like “Committed”, and I’m currently reading “This Book Will Change Your Life”, I've read comics like “Diary of a Wimpy Kid” and “Maya Zankoul’s Amalgams”, I’ve read Business books like “The 48 Laws of Power”, “The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership”, and “Developing The Leader Within You Workbook”. Yes, I've taken a liking to John Maxwell! In fact, I was at Virgin Megastore the other day when I came across “The Maxwell Daily Reader” which is packed with a collection of 365 pages of major points from several of his major books to last me the whole year through! Oh, and I've joined as a member in Al Mouna Public Library where I've found a beautiful collection of books (even on Photography) which I hope to make the best use of!

I got back to Writing this year, in more ways than one. First, I blogged like I had intended to and I intend to keep it up. I had also intended to write for a book. And, I did end up writing a book, just not the book I had in mind. See, in April, Al Mouna Public Library launched a writing competition for a children’s story on Tripoli. I participated with a rhyme story I wrote called “SuSu in the Souk”, and I actually came off as a first place winner in the English Section! My story, along with the second and third place winners in the English Section and the six other winners from the Arabic and French Sections were all made into a children’s book called Qisati! I hope to keep writing, as it’s a big part of what I’m all about!

I think what I’m proud of the most this year is the brave step I took towards Photography. I've always dreamed of owning a digital SLR camera, and after a bit of research and taking people’s suggestions, I decided to invest in the Canon Rebel Xsi/D450 (with a special thanks to Danny who bought it for me from the USA for a much cheaper price than it was being sold in Lebanon). And ever since, I've been in love with it. A whole new world has opened up to me with SLRs! Aperture, Shutter Speed, Depth of Field, ISO, I own those terms! And what I’m most thankful for are the many opportunities We Love Tripoli’s “Shoot As You Walk” events have been providing me with. With each journey we take to take pictures of Tripoli, I discover something new about my camera, and shooting techniques that have made a lot of differences to my work! But I still have so much to learn! I want to learn to understand lenses now, because I've seen those beautiful zoom lenses which I've been dying to use! I need to figure them out, and decide which one to invest in. Also, as ashamed as I am to admit this, I have NO idea how to use Photoshop. Hopefully by the end of next year, I’ll know how to work it! So stay tuned…

You know sometimes I feel that I have a real life and an Online life, taking into consideration the amount of time I spend online! I've learned a lot from the internet, I’ve taken a lot of information out of it. And in 2011 I hope to stay informed, in terms of Business, Politics, Electronics, Food, Fashion & Style, the list is endless. But, I need to cut down on my hours of usage, and spend more time in the real world…

All in all 2010 has been a damn good year, in fact; it’s been one of the best years of the decade for me! L7amdillah. To everything old and new, I hope I’ll be seeing a lot more in 2011…

A Happy New Year To The World!!! :-)

You Know My Name

After I got off work yesterday, I went out for big family lunch at Baytna (ex-Chopstix). It’s the second time I’ve been there (the first time was during Eid-El-Fitr about a month ago). Grandma, Mum, my auntie and I were the first to arrive and we sat to wait for Reem, Cici (her daughter/my cousin), her mum, and her sister to arrive…

A little less than 10 minutes later, they arrived. I was sitting at the far end of the table when one of the waiters came in carrying Cici in her baby seat and placed her on the floor next to our table. I instantly jumped out of my seat and onto the floor and for the first time ever, Cici looked at me and exclaimed “Nou!” (it’s the best she can say my name right now) and she’s never said my name before but it was just such a magical feeling and she tried to jump out of her seat and into my arms. I untied her and picked her up and she kept singing my name in a song “Nou! Nou! Nou!”

I never thought hearing my name would feel so special. “Cici,” Reem said, “give Nour a kiss”. I turned my cheek to her and she leaned in and gave me the biggest slobbery wet kiss, which was the cutest thing ever! :-)

Happy Birthday To Me!

Yup, today is one of the most important days in history, as Diala joked this morning, its my 23rd birthday! :-)

(To Be Continued...)

A Eid Mubarak!

Today is officially the first day of Eid! And as excited as I might be, Eid is never more exciting than when you’re a kid. No, I’ll never forget the wonderful days of Eid I used to spend with my brother when we were younger…

We’d both wake up really early and Dad would go with my brother to the mosque for Eid Prayers, then they’d visit my paternal grandfather (and then a few years later, my paternal grandmother) at the graveyard. I always used to be afraid of going with them. So in the meantime on such mornings, Mum would take me to the hairdresser’s so we could get our hair done, and then we’d get dressed and visit my maternal grandma’s house for a big family Eid lunch. It’d be packed with people, including all my grandma’s sisters and brothers, their spouses, their children and their children’s spouses, and their children’s children. The food would be (and still is) as scrumptious as ever, with the traditional vine leaves, lamb chops, tater tots, salad, and other appetizers and desserts gran would make. With all the people there, there’d usually be no room for us at the table so we’d end up sitting with the rest of the children (all of them at least five years younger than us) at the kid’s table they’d set up for us in the kitchen. I can’t say I especially enjoyed those “stuck with the children” moments, but my brother and I always had our inside jokes…

Today, the tradition didn’t change that much (apart from the fact I didn’t have my brother with us, lucky you, F!). Today, I woke up, had breakfast and lounged, took a bath, went to get my hair done, got dressed, then went to gran’s. As expected, I was greeted with more people than could fit in a room! The grown ups (that I don’t even see except during this time of year) gave me the traditional compliments and asked me how university was, and I corrected them with “don’t you mean how's work”? And then there were the children again, a total of 10 this year, aged between 7 months and 9 years. As usual I felt misplaced, with the closest youngest person my age being 9 and the closest oldest person my age being 32 (I’m 22)…

“You have a passcode on your phone, don’t you” the nine-year-old asked me as I was taking a picture of my baby cousin Celine (who I of course love the most from all the children). I looked at her and asked, “Why? Did you try using my phone?”. “No,” she giggled, “but Dad has the same phone as you do (iPhone) and I figured out his passcode”. “Aha”. “Come here,” she said in a quiet voice, “I want to tell you something”. I leaned in closer, “what is it?” “I’m going to tell you Dad’s passcode”. “But I don’t want to know it” “Why not?” “Um, because I don’t want to go through his phone, that's an invasion of privacy”. “Privacy?” She looked like she had no clue what the word “privacy” meant. “Let me tell you his passcode,” she said again. “Ok,” I sighed, I thought it was the quickest way to end this conversation. “1… 4… 3… 0” “Thanks”. “But you have to keep it a secret, Dad doesn’t know that I know. But I know. You wanna know how I know? It’s because once, when he was entering his passcode, I pretended not to look but I looked. And that’s how I know!” “You’re secret’s safe with me”…

“Can I use your camera?” HELL NO! “um, no” “ok” OK? “so let me tell you about school…” and she went into another 10 minute rant about her teachers and how “this one time,” I have no idea what happened… Akh, I’ve got to love Eid! :-)

“I’m Making Plans Not To Make Plans While I’m Here”

I’m free! I’m free! I’m finally free! Today is the first day of my 15 consecutive day summer vacation. And up until recently, I had plots and I had plans… But you know what? I’m tired of making things happen. This summer, I resign!

After school, after university, after anything you leave or no longer are a part of, you tend to have a lot of scattered friends. Some in different continents, or in different countries, or in different cities, or even in the same city! But no matter how close or far, each friend ends up leading his/her own life, with his/her own personal thoughts and feelings, with some who are lonely, some who are content, and some who don’t even know the difference…

At this moment in time, I’m content (and yes, I do know the difference) sitting on the beach, either reading a good book, writing, or being with the people that actually happen to be a part of my daily life. This summer, I don’t feel the need to make an effort and bring people together, to make things happen. At this moment in time, I’m content just chillin’ like a villain… why?

Because I’m fed up with all the failed plans I’d made with people, like travelling, trips, and little pieces of this and that. Don’t get me wrong, I’d made all these plans with people I love but there’s this thing that (most) people forget to do: follow through! And I’m out of NRJ… :-P

So forgive me dears for not calling you, for not making an effort, because for once, I’m letting things happen from your sides, so if you want me, you know where to find me! ;-)

SuSu In The Souk

“In April 2010, a writing competition was held for the youth in North Lebanon as part of Beirut World Book Capital. Around 40 persons have participated in this project and the best stories were picked, collected, edited and constituted this book…”

That’s right; I finally got a hardcopy of “قصتي”. It’s a brilliant book, and it’s even more brilliant how fast it’s been put together and published! Here are the front and back covers:

But I have to admit, I was a little disappointed to see that instead of my illustrations, there were someone else’s. I asked why. And apparently, the printing press had asked for the book a little earlier than had been scheduled, so that by the time I had sent in my illustrations, the book was already in print :-|.

Here were supposed to be my illustrations (+ cover page):

Oh well, I guess it’s a sign I’m a better writer than I am an illustrator. Here’s the full text version of “Susu in the Souk” (Comments Welcome!):

SuSu in the Souk

Once upon a time, in a city by the sea,

That many know as Tripoli,

There lived an orange in an orange tree…

…

One day the orange was picked by a girl named Susu

Who bent down to tie her shoe

When all of a sudden, a gust of wind blew…

It rolled the orange down the street,

So Susu chased after it, under the summer heat

Till it rolled between an old man’s feet…

…

All around her, Susu saw shoes

But where had the orange gone? She needed clues

So she asked the old man, had he any news?

He said, “This is ‘Souk Al Kindarjieh’ my dear,

Shoes are all we’ve ever had here.

But keep on looking, your orange must be near”

…

So Susu walked on, till she saw a young man

“Can you help me?” she asked him, he said “Yes, I sure can”

“I’m looking for my orange; it’s of a yellowish tan”

He said, “Well it can’t be here in ‘Souk Al Siyaghin’

We only have gold, fit for a queen

Look, isn’t it the finest you’ve ever seen?”

…

Susu walked on, till she saw soaps of every shape and size,

Towering up towards the skies

She almost couldn’t believe her eyes…

She turned around to look at a sign

It read ‘Khan Al Saboun’ in a nice design

But Susu had to go make sure that her orange was still fine…

---

So Susu walked on, to the next path she chose

Where a scent began to fill her nose

And the smell of herbs and spices rose…

“Welcome to ‘Souk Al Atareen’” said a young boy,

Who stopped playing with his car toy

And he asked Susu, “Want some herbs? I’m sure you’ll enjoy!”

---

Susu walked on, till she reached a pool filled with water

She needed a drink, as the weather was getting hotter

When she heard a lady say “come sit with me, my daughter”

“Where am I?” asked Susu, the lady said, “‘Al Mallaha Pool’”

And she turned to join the old lady sitting on a stool

She was eating a plate of hummus and fool…

---

Susu asked “where oh where could my orange be?”

“Its right there,” said the lady, “can’t you see?”

And she pointed towards an orange tree

“Where we end is where we begin” she said,

Then she patted Susu’s head,

But there’s much more of Tripoli left for you to discover, so go ahead!

Realizations And Resolutions From 2009

At the close of every year, I often find myself sitting on a couch in my living room facing the few remaining hours of the year. And it’s at turning points like those that make me stop, look, and listen…

One of the first (and come to think of it, inconsequential) things I think about is how everyone else was celebrating their New Year. Some were at home with their families. Some were at home with their friends. Some were home with their lovers. Some were out with their families. Some were out with their friends. Some were out with their lovers. Everyone was spending it with at least someone, just the way it’s meant to be. And even me, I chose to celebrate New Year’s a little differently this year. For the first time I spent it out, with two of my closest friends and hundreds of strangers. But that’s where I learned my first (and come to think of it, inconsequential) lesson of the New Year:

There’s no such thing as a perfect New Year’s!

Why? Because you can’t be with everyone you want to be with. I also wanted to be with my family, my (other) friends, and my lover (who is currently nonexistent, but that’s not the point)…

So, back to the point I started with: This New Year’s, I was not sitting on a couch in my living room facing the few remaining hours of the year. And because of that, I didn’t have my vintage pen to paper (or in this case, fingers to keyboard) moment to jolt down my realizations and resolutions…

For the past couple of years, I’d set pretty much the same goals: waste less time online, study more (this is the first year I get to tick that off the list!), enjoy life more, yada yada yada… But this year, I wanted to be more specific, I wanted to think of more detailed resolutions for 2010. So, a little over two weeks later, this is it:

Last year, I put Prayer and the attempt to be closer to my religion, and to God. I definitely fell short in terms of prayer, and that’s why I’m putting it in again this year, because I plan on reestablishing a good connection. But in terms of religion, and closeness with God, I can definitely say that I’ve felt tighter. I’m more spiritual, I believe. I’ve been attending religious lectures on a bimonthly basis, and I plan on continuing to do so. I believe this year I’ve been blessed with more than I could have asked for, and I thank God everyday. Because He’s what comes first and foremost to me…

Family. The difference between family and friends is the fact that Family is constant, it doesn’t change. From the day you are born to the day you die, your family is there, whether you like it or not. Luckily, I’ve been blessed with a beautiful family. Two wonderful parents, a wonderful brother, a wonderful grandmother, aunts, uncles, cousins, aunt’s husbands, uncle’s wives, I wouldn’t change a member for the world. And that’s a blessing I’ll always count…

Friends. Here’s where it gets a little more complicated, at least to me. I grew up and spent time in a lot of different places, and because of that, I’ve met a lot a lot of different people. Some stayed just that, people I’ve met. Some because acquaintances, some became friends, and some became best friends. But I always had my groups. When I was in school, my favorite friends were my school friends. But time separated us, and when I was in university, my favorite friends changed to my university friends (esp Daniel and Nadine, who will forever be among my favorites). During my summer internship I met a girl who was my favorite person for a good year and a half before she moved to Bahrain. I then joined Toastmasters and my favorite people were several of the members. I then started work and I have favorite people there too. My point is, the people you care most about change depending on who sticks. And what I’ve learned from that is this: love the people you have (right here, right now) with all your heart, because you can, because they’re there, because they won’t always be. And through these transitions, I’ve learned a second important lesson:

School and University and Work are three different worlds. And the people of each of those three worlds come in all shapes and sizes. See at school, you’re presented with a small bundle of girls and boys and from them you get to pick your favorites to be friends. Some will stick with you through university and some will fade. At university, you’re not presented with a small bundle but a big bundle, and you pick the best. And at work, well, I’ve been taught that you go to work to work, not to make friends. Despite that lesson though, I’ve made some good friends (I’d like to think ;-). Likewise, I’ve met some downright shitfaced people in life (though they’re extremely few). This brings me to the third lesson I’ve learned in this respect:

No matter how good you are, not everyone is going to like you. Likewise, you don’t have to like everyone. You don’t. I guess at this point in my life, I know more people than I care to be real friends with. I always respect and am as kind and considerate as I can be with everyone I cross paths with. But at the end of the day, I know whose company I really enjoy. You know whose company you really enjoy. You know it because of that feel good feeling you get from being with them. And it’s those people that are worth sticking with…

I say I want to be more independent. I’m not sure what I mean exactly when I say that, but I think in way, it could start with me being more physically healthy, eating right, learning to cook. As of last year, I can make three foods with perfection: Pancakes, Macaroni, and… and… ok, two foods. This year, I opt to learn more. Next,

Work. Last year, I finally got my first real job. It’s not in the city or the major I initially chose, but I guess that’s where all great stories are created (and so far, so good! ;-). My resolutions for work? I want to be like a sponge and soak up everything I can. Additionally, I want to research and teach myself to understand, read, and follow the stock market. Maybe even invest. I always hear the words of AUB’s ex-president, Mr. John Waterbury saying: “Try to make wherever you go and whatever you do a little better than what you found or started…” And those words go a long way in my books…

After work comes Toastmasters. In Toastmasters, the club that I’ve been a part of for almost a year an a half now, I want to keep believing in its mission, especially for my beloved city, Tripoli. I want complete my Competent Communicator & Leadership Manuals by May 2010. I want to run for, get elected, and serve as a club Treasurer during this third season of LoudSpeakers. And hopefully, if I follow through, I’d like to take on a more demanding officer role for the fourth season in June 2010…

So far, I’ve talked about my relationships with the world. So now it’s time I start talking about my relationship with myself, and that’s something that should never be underestimated:

If there’s one thing I’m looking forward to this year, it’s a Vacation. Ever since I’ve started work in March of last year, I’ve been stripped of personal days off. The only breaks I’ve had last year were those that involved official holidays like Easter, Eid, Independence Day, and Christmas. Come March of this year, I’ll have been working for a year and will then be entitled to a break. And in this break, I’d like number one: personal rest at home. And number two: trips. Within Lebanon, I’d like to go to cities or villages I’ve never visited. Lebanon is a haven, and there are such places to be discovered. I also want to go to the snow, either Cedars or Faraya. I haven’t been to the snow in years. And finally in my break, I want to travel abroad, with my friends, to a place I’ve never been. I’d love to visit the Far East, Malaysia or Thailand. Europe would be a second option, Germany or Italy. Or Greece…

Writing. If I had to choose one word to define me, “writing” would be it. In the second half of 2009, I lost it. And by “it”, I mean words. I ran out of ink and enthusiasm and it crushed me. Because to me, writing is important. And it comes in many forms. First, it comes in the form of blogging. Second, it comes in the form of poetry. And third, it comes in the form of a book. See I used to blog (www.sunkentreasure.blogspot.com) but then I disconnected, I used to write poems but words have failed me, and I used to write for my book, but again, words have failed me. This is the year I hope to find my words again. Not long ago, I started a new blog (www.nourspot.blogspot.com), and I hope to write poetry again and go back to the Poetry Club in Cava Minos for inspiration again. I also hope to at least finish the outline of the book I plan on publishing one day in my twenties…

Photography. At a close second to writing, comes photography. To me, my camera comes before my cell phone, my laptop, and my car. And that’s saying something. Every time I hold a camera, I feel like I have the world at my fingertips. It captures the moments; it brings me closer to little bits of life. I remember with the first paycheck of my first summer internship in 2007, I bought a Sony Cyber-Shot W55 and I’ve had it ever since. But for quite a while now, I’ve been thinking of taking it to the next level with photography. That’s right, I’ve been thinking of investing in a DSLR Camera, one of the big boys. I’ve been researching several Canon and Nikon offers, and as soon as I pick a winner, I’m taking the plunge. I want to pursue this passion...

I said I wanted to Read more. Last year, I read all four books of “The Twilight Saga”, and among the other three books I can remember, “Who Moved My Cheese?”, “Eat Pray Love”, and “I, The Divine”. And I’ve got a load of unread books resting on my bookshelf. So let’s write down the titles of books I should have read by this time next year: “Anne Frank: The Diary of A Young Girl”, “Angela’s Ashes”, “Sophie’s World”, “The Pelican Brief”, “I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings”, “The Shining”, “The Mysterious Island”, “The Professor”, and “Pride and Prejudice”. Oh, and the unofficial “Midnight Sun”…

Writing, Photography, and Reading. Those three things really put smiles on my face and I think it’s because they take me to other worlds. And that’s also why I need to be careful, not to spend too much time in those “other worlds”. I want to be more open to what’s going on in the real world around me, in terms of World News, Politics, I definitely need to be less ignorant in such matters…

You know I’ve always been a dreamer. An extreme dreamer, like I dream of travelling the world, moving to British Columbia, studying Marine Biology researching the cetaceans of the sea, playing the electric guitar, finding the love of my life, and I guess the idealist in me would say that I can do all of that. But then you’ve got your realistic dreams. Like I dream about finishing my MBA, PHd, I don’t know how far ahead I can dream but I’d like to make a final point: See at one point, we grow up and we grow realistic. I think it’s that time for me now, and we draw a line between what we really can do and what we really can’t. I’ve thought long and hard about my resolutions, careful not to go to extremes. And I believe I am capable of following through. You know, I think just by writing this I’ve already started fulfilling a part of my resolution to write more (I hope I don’t jinx myself, though!). And I hope I can make a difference this year, I really want to be the best that I can be, in a more grown up kind of way. I also want it to be my year of acceptance, of more love, and of more life… and a Happy New Year to the world! :-)