Monday, March 11, 2013

Now Is Good

I think I've mentioned this before, about the months of March and April being the months of loss. I've always thought of them as the months that, when the weather gets warmer, the ice melts away (in a figurative meaning), leaving only those who were strong enough to have survived the winter. And I heard the first death note on Saturday...

At the end of our work day, one of the tellers chocked out in sobs. He found out that his father had passed away. Some colleagues rushed over to console him but I just sat there, unable to move. I didn't know what to do, what to say. While most would say "I'm sorry for your loss", I felt like that those words weren't enough. No words were, or ever could be enough to express a loss, especially in that moment. So, while I still wished I'd said something, I couldn't…

Later that afternoon, I was watching a DVD, "Now Is Good". Its about "a girl dying of leukaemia (who) compiles a list of things she'd like to do before passing away". I don't tend to get too emotional during movies but towards the end, it was strong enough to bring tears to my eyes. And it made me wonder, if you knew you was going to die, would you really want to "do things" or would being surrounded by your parents, your little brother, your best friends, and if you're lucky to have him, your boyfriend be enough? Just being with you, day in and day out, with so much love, until one day, you just disappear, you cease to exist...

"Our life is a series of moments. Each one a journey to the end. Let them go. Let them all go…"

After work this afternoon, I went with a group of colleagues to give our condolences. I sat in a seat I always sit in during times like these, I thought the same thoughts I think of during times like these, and I silently prayed for another lost soul I never knew but feel like I did. Because in the end we're all brothers and sisters, we're all one family with the same thoughts and feelings towards what matters most in life...

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